Best Joke?

Subject: Best Joke? Tue 03 Feb 2009, 10:08 pm

Gief me your best jokes!

This isn't my best but it is a joke.

Q.What do you call a White Guy pushing a car up a hill?
A. White Power

Q.What do you call a Black Guy pushing a car up a hill?
A. Black Power

Q.What do you call a Asian Guy pushing a car up a hill?
A.Asian Power

Q. What do you call a Mexican Guy pushing a car up a hill?
A. Stealing.

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Tue 03 Feb 2009, 10:09 pm

Lol'd a little.

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Tue 03 Feb 2009, 10:12 pm

Almost lol'd

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Tue 03 Feb 2009, 11:28 pm

This guy enters a restaurant. Obviously, he has an attitude problem.
Walks right up to the waiter and says:
"Excuse me, Bubba. But I want you to go in the back and you tell that cook I want a cheeeeeesssseeeeburger; not too greasy, not too dry, but right...in...the groove. And hey, while you at it, throw in a large order of french fries; not too crunchy, not too soft, but right...in...the groove. And while you at it, I want you to whip up a chocolate milk shake; not too thick, not too thin, but right...in...the groove."

The man went to the back, talked to the cook. Came back out five minutes later and says:
"Look, the cook said to tell you to kiss his behind. NOT to the left, NOT to the right, BUT...RIGHT...IN...THE GROOVE!"

^ I stoles this

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Tue 03 Feb 2009, 11:32 pm

Earz wrote:: This guy enters a restaurant. Obviously, he has an attitude problem.
Walks right up to the waiter and says:
"Excuse me, Bubba. But I want you to go in the back and you tell that cook I want a cheeeeeesssseeeeburger; not too greasy, not too dry, but right...in...the groove. And hey, while you at it, throw in a large order of french fries; not too crunchy, not too soft, but right...in...the groove. And while you at it, I want you to whip up a chocolate milk shake; not too thick, not too thin, but right...in...the groove."

The man went to the back, talked to the cook. Came back out five minutes later and says:
"Look, the cook said to tell you to kiss his behind. NOT to the left, NOT to the right, BUT...RIGHT...IN...THE GROOVE!"

^ I stoles this

lol

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Wed 04 Feb 2009, 12:40 am

Q: What do you call a barn full of black people?
A: Antique farm equipment.

Q: How do you keep black people out of your front yard?
A: Hang them in the back.

Q: Why is L.A full of fags and N.Y is full of niggers?
A: L.A had first choice.

Q: What's funnier than a dead baby?
A: A dead baby sitting next to a kid with down-syndrome.

Q: What's the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline?
A: When you jump on a trampoline you take your boots off.

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Wed 04 Feb 2009, 1:19 am

That last one UzedPaper was not funny nor was the fourth one. The rest were funny though.

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Wed 04 Feb 2009, 1:23 am

A White man, a Black man, an Asian and a Hispanic are all on top of a mountain.
The Hispanic goes: "THIS IS FOR MY PEOPLE!" *Jumps off the mountain*
The Asian goes: "THIS IS FOR MY PEOPLE!" *Jumps off the mountain*
The Black guy goes: "THIS IS FOR MY PEOPLE!" *Grabs the White dude, threw that motherfucker off*

^ stoles this one too

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Wed 04 Feb 2009, 1:24 am

Haha Earz that is hilarious.

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Wed 04 Feb 2009, 1:47 pm

Best nerd joke ever:

Two atoms were in a bar and one atom says to the other-
"I think i lost an electron"
The other Atom replies-
"Are you sure?"
And the first Atom says-
"I'm Positive"

Ahh.. the joy of knowing things and all it's failures.

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Wed 04 Feb 2009, 1:54 pm

kitch wrote:: Best nerd joke ever:

Two atoms were in a bar and one atom says to the other-
"I think i lost an electron"
The other Atom replies-
"Are you sure?"
And the first Atom says-
"I'm Positive"

Ahh.. the joy of knowing things and all it's failures.

old but gold

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Wed 04 Feb 2009, 2:01 pm

captainfalcon wrote:

kitch wrote:: Best nerd joke ever:

Two atoms were in a bar and one atom says to the other-
"I think i lost an electron"
The other Atom replies-
"Are you sure?"
And the first Atom says-
"I'm Positive"

Ahh.. the joy of knowing things and all it's failures.

old but gold

Stole it from Fallout though...

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Wed 04 Feb 2009, 2:03 pm

blackjokes.net wrote:: Tatooed Penis
This fellow was so deeply in love that just before he was married, he had his bride's name tattooed on his love muscle. Normally, only the first and last letters were visible, although when he was aroused, the tattoo spelled out W-E-N-D-Y. Now they're on their honeymoon at a resort in Montego Bay. One night, in the men's room, this fellow finds himself standing next to a tall Jamaican at the urinal. To his amazement, he notices that this man, too, has the letters W-Y tattooed on his penis. "Excuse me," he says, "but I couldn't help noticing your tattoo. Do you have a girlfriend named Wendy?" "No way, mon, I work for the Tourist board. Mine reads, "Welcome to Jamaica, mon, have a nice day.'"

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Wed 04 Feb 2009, 2:47 pm

kitch wrote:

captainfalcon wrote:

kitch wrote:: Best nerd joke ever:

Two atoms were in a bar and one atom says to the other-
"I think i lost an electron"
The other Atom replies-
"Are you sure?"
And the first Atom says-
"I'm Positive"

Ahh.. the joy of knowing things and all it's failures.

old but gold

Stole it from Fallout though...

fallout stole it from some dude that first came up with this joke.......

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Wed 04 Feb 2009, 2:50 pm

A little guy is sitting at the bar just staring at his drink for half an hour when this big trouble-making biker steps next to him, grabs his drink, gulps it down in one swig and then turns to the guy with a menacing stare as if to say, 'What'cha gonna do about it?'

The poor little guy starts crying.

'Come on man I was just giving you a hard time,' the biker says. 'I didn't think you'd CRY.' 'I can't stand to see a man crying.

“This is the worst day of my life,” says the little guy between sobs. “I can't do anything right.” “I overslept and was late to an important meeting, so my boss fired me.”

When I went to the parking lot, I found my car was stolen and I don't have any insurance. I left my wallet in the cab I took home. I found my wife in bed with the gardener and my dog bit me.

So I came to this bar trying to work up the courage to put an end to my life, and then you show up and drink the damn poison.

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Wed 04 Feb 2009, 4:25 pm

Your mom is so fat, cows moo at her. affraid

Sorry, I'm tired

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Wed 04 Feb 2009, 4:35 pm

Q: Do you know why so many blacks were killed in Vietnam?
A: Because every time the seargeant said: "Get down!" they stood up and started dancing.

Q: Why dont blacks celibrate thanksgiving?
A: KFC isnt open on holidays.

Q: Why are aspirins white?
A: Because they work.

Q:Where do you see 5 white guys on a bench?
A: The NBA.

^ stole some.

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Wed 04 Feb 2009, 4:51 pm

Andrew wrote:: Your mom is so fat, cows moo at her.
Sorry, I'm tired

Haha!

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Wed 04 Feb 2009, 4:57 pm

mine is so fucking hilerious listen to this one

What did one brick say to the other ?
answer:your hardcore

What did one tree say to the other
answer: get out and take your roots with you

what did the moonkin say to the rogue?
answer:noob

SO FUNNY woo

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Wed 04 Feb 2009, 4:58 pm

Q: What's funnier than a dead baby?
A: A dead baby in a clown suit.

Q: What's the difference between a dead baby and a corvette?
A: I don't have a corvette in my backyard.

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Wed 04 Feb 2009, 5:10 pm

Pomp wrote:: Q: What's funnier than a dead baby?
A: A dead baby in a clown suit.

Q: What's the difference between a dead baby and a corvette?
A: I don't have a corvette in my backyard.

Not fun at all imo...

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Wed 04 Feb 2009, 5:17 pm

Sanodar wrote:

Pomp wrote:: Q: What's funnier than a dead baby?
A: A dead baby in a clown suit.

Q: What's the difference between a dead baby and a corvette?
A: I don't have a corvette in my backyard.

Not fun at all imo...

/ edit

FUNNY xD

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Wed 04 Feb 2009, 5:26 pm

i got some jokes

Q. Why do women have small feet?
A. to stand closer to the cooker

Q. What happened to Cindarella when she reached the Ball
A. she choked.

Q. What does 'wife' stand for?
A. Wash Iron Fuck Excetera

Q. what do you call a bunch of black people in a field?
A. the good old days.

Q. what do you get when you put a baby in a blender?
A. I dont know about you, but i get a Boner!

Q. what's the difference between a baby and an apple?
A. i dont cum on an aple before eating it...

Q. what's brown and sticky?
A. a stick.

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Wed 04 Feb 2009, 5:27 pm

4gwida1 wrote:: i got some jokes

Q. Why do women have small feet?
A. to stand closer to the cooker

Q. What happened to Cindarella when she reached the Ball
A. she choked.

Q. What does 'wife' stand for?
A. Wash Iron Fuck Excetera

Q. what do you call a bunch of black people in a field?
A. the good old days.

Q. what do you get when you put a baby in a blender?
A. I dont know about you, but i get a Boner!

Q. what's the difference between a baby and an apple?
A. i dont cum on an aple before eating it...

Q. what's brown and sticky?
A. a stick.

To stand closer to the cooker?
You're a moron.

Subject: Re: Best Joke? Wed 04 Feb 2009, 5:37 pm

A white man, a black man, and a mexican man are walking on a beach and they find a lamp, so they start rubbing the lamp and a geenie comes out and says "You all get one wish each!"

So the black guy says "I want all my people in America to be back in Africa and be happy

And POOF! all the black people from America are in africa and happy

The mexican guy says "And i want all of my people in America to be back in mexico and be happy"

And POOF! all the mexicans from America are back in Mexico and are happy

And the white guy says " You're telling me all the black people and mexicans are out of America?.... I'll have a Coke then"

not mine

Still pretty funny

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